The Musical Donald Trump

If real-estate mogul turned reality-TV star Donald Trump has his way, his tube sensation may soon hit the Great White Way as The Apprentice: The Musical.

No, really.

“There’s tremendous buzz about it on the Broadway circuit. Every producer on Broadway wants to get involved with us. I think The Apprentice on Broadway would be a smash,” said Trump, in his typical understated fashion.

Details on the proposed theatrical extravaganza, a coproduction between Trump and Apprentice creator Mark Burnett, are sketchy. Burnett describes the plot as an inspirational love story and Trump confirms it will feature a character based on him, that it won’t simply be a rehash of a TV episode and that the leading man will be a hottie.

“I just want the reincarnation of Cary Grant to play me,” the magnate said Tuesday in an NBC conference call. “I don’t care if he can act, I just want him to be great looking.”

But seriously, folks…

“[The musical] still needs to stand on its own legs,” Trump said. “You can’t just put the name Apprentice on a Broadway marquee and think it’s going to do well. People are too smart for that. I think if it’s able to show the drama, the tension…the anxiety and all of the other things The Apprentice shows, it’s going to be a very big hit on Broadway.”

In the meantime, Trump will focus his attention on The Apprentice: Book Smarts vs. Street Smarts, the third installment of his NBC reality drama, which premieres Thursday night at 8:30 p.m. ET/PT.

The new season, pitted applicants with college educations against self-made business people sans degrees and was inspired by the popularity of past Apprentice wannabes like season one’s Troy, the budding real-estate developer who was a fan favorite, although his post-high school education essentially amounted to reading books written by the Donald.

According to Trump, the new season will feature the best boardroom scenes yet. He also says the cast is loaded with the kind of Troy-esque characters who viewers love, and who have wowed the Donald and his cohorts with their business savvy and competitiveness.

“They are so smart, so cunning and so driven…maybe more driven, because they have a little chip on their shoulder,” he said. “[What surprised me most] is how smart these so-called poorly educated, relatively poorly educated, people are.”

Minipreview of the premiere: The two groups are made up of some tough-talkin’, no-nonsense aspiring execs. And then there’s Danny, a 39-year-old marketing technology firm owner who’s given to group cheerleading, wearing leisure suits and singing cheesy songs he’s written, while strumming his ever-present guitar.

Not to give away any major action–though we will tell you that the first boardroom firing scene is a good one!–we will spill that Danny’s “Kumbayah” corniness clashes with his team’s goal during the first task of the new season: marketing a new burger for Burger King.

In other news involving the Donald:
Though he’s only contracted to do the show through season three, Trump said he’s likely to sign on for seasons four and five of The Apprentice. “NBC very badly wants to renew my contract,” he said. “As long as the ratings continue to be high, this is something I enjoy doing. There’s something very seductive about being a television star. At some point I think I’ll agree to do it.” Though ratings from season one (which averaged 20.7 million viewers) to season two (which averaged 16.1 million viewers) dipped, NBC execs point out that The Apprentice finished its second installment as the number three prime-time show among the prized 18-49 demographic.
Casting for season four of The Apprentice begins in New York City next week, and Trump is not optimistic, or modest, when it comes to prospects of NBC finding a substitute for him should he not decide to re-up his contract. “It’s not going to be so easy to replace me. I wouldn’t want to replace me.”
Trump said his famous TV catchphrase continues to follow him wherever he goes. “In the locker room of the Trump International Hotel in Palm Beach…a young boy walked in with his father, saw me putting on my pants, and started screaming, ‘You’re fired! You’re fired!’ That was a strange deal.”
Fans who think partying with the Donald and then being stuck on a cruise ship with babe-trolling, bow-tied season two reject Raj sounds like a swell time can set sail on next fall’s The Apprentice Legend Cruise Ship.
Meanwhile, never one to pass up a promotional opportunity, the synergistic Trump is taking advantage of the hype surrounding The Apprentice premiere to get married. He and 34-year-old Slovenian model Melania Knauss are set to tie the knot this weekend.

Despite reports that the nuptials would be televised, Trump, 58, decided the affair, which takes place Saturday at his Mar-a-Lago estate in Palm Beach, should be a private one. “The last wedding that was televised was Prince Charles and Lady Di, and guess what, that didn’t work out too well,” he said.

And as for the guest list for the wedding, which will feature the bride in a Vogue cover-making, USD 100,000 Christian Dior gown…there’s nary an Apprentice contestant past or present among the invited.